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journey to motherhood

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im 1-year married to Abg Armand Abg Ismail. And ive been pregnant twice, but none of them stay. both are miscarried. when a bulky blood rushes out of me, i was stunned. speechless. i flushed the toilet and went to my room, sitting n thinking what to do. after a while, took my hp and dialed '2' for speed dial to hubby. i dont know that to tell him, but i said "dah sekda.." (its gone..). then the story goes..


im not interested to write the details now. its just painful (still). its my 2nd pregnancy and it was like our present for our 1st anniversary. i guess you cant consider something alive (or possibly not alive) as a present. cos it can somehow be gone without a warning.

*sigh. here goes my next 3 months cycle. again. i thought i wont go through this again, but then.. Only God knows that i have to do this all over again..

patient is the key word. i consider this as a punishments to all my previous sins.. which i have a LOT! so, i should not think negative but rather taking everything positive. coz i know there are reasons for all these, and that its all planned by god. i believe that the sun always shine after the rain.. (unless its rainy season.. like in Kuching and Sibu now..)

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